I have this problem. Ever since I’ve been married and had to share a bed with someone my body has turned into a contortionists body. The only difference is, is I’m not a contortionist and my body should NOT be in some of these postitions. I don’t know what it is about sharing a bed that makes my body go all wacky. When I had the bed to myself I would sleep on my stomach on the very edge of the bed. Now all of the sudden that I HAVE to share a bed it’s like my body has a sensor of how to annoy the person I’m sleeping with. (That person is my husband by the way)
I have taken the liberty to illustrate a couple of my sleeping positions with the help of Paint! (YOU ARE WELCOME!)
Let me introduce you to “The Four”:
Just for reference just because my stick figure is naked and hairless does not me I sleep nude or have no hair. I just wanted to clear that up.
“The Four” is generally the one that I wake up to the most. Although it is comfortable my husband doesn’t appreciate being kneed (real word?) throughout the night.
Next up–”The Frog with Crossed Arms”
This one is more rare although it does happen. I think it happens when I’m having a dream about my husband buying ice cream sandwiches instead of popsicles.
This is the one I woke up in last night “The Pretzel”:
It looks a little freaky but the only thing freaky about it is the fact that my shoulders are aching the next morning when I sleep like this.
This one is titled “I Don’t Know”:
This one’s hard to see but basically my left leg is propped up on my right leg. It sort of creates a tent like effect on our covers. I think I need to just take sleeping pills–I don’t feel like I’m getting my REM cycle in…
And just for kicks–a dog picture:
Hi Everybody! I'm Angela. I love my dogs, adore my husband and try to make the best out of everyday! 
I usually have to sleep on my stomach. I also have issues when someone is in the bed with me. Alone, I sleep fine. I do toss and turn a bit, but I’m alone so who cares?! But when someone is in the bed I get all uncomfortable about switching positions as to not disrupt them much and then I don’t sleep well. If I get married again, we’re just going to have to have seperate bedrooms!
Oh, I can sooooooooooooo relate! I have a terrible time getting comfortable. My ideal sleeping position? Sprawled diagonally across the bed. Now that’s comfort! Too bad it’s not comfortable for Josh!
Blessings!
Lacy
I love that you showed us a naked, hairless version of yourself in all the weird positions… I don’t think I’ve ever named mine. What are the pink dots??
LOL I deal with that with my children…UGH
LOL This is hilarious!! It is your duty to annoy your husband for the rest of your life and vice versa. That is what marriage is all about!
I love the Number 4 position. I do that all the time!
ROTFLMAO!!!! that is the funniest thing i have seen all day! i usually wake up in a position like the pretzel, except my arm is over my face
Tabitha Blue-the pink dots were an attempt at a decoration on the “comforter” although I don’t sleep on top of the comforter so I’m not sure where I was going with the drawings! haha
THAT was good. Too funny!!
My husband now wedges a pillow between us…I guess he doesn’t like the knee is his back anymore. Wuss.
LOL I would have totally thought you were nude and hairless without your clarification. Thank you.
Seriously, those drawings would have taken me forever. But what do the pink bubbles represent?
Also, good luck with the auto repairs. Sucks to have car problems. =(
This cracks me up! That shoulder position is really bad for your shoulders BUT you can fix it if you have a good massage therapist (me…) OR you have hubby push his thumb right into the middle of your shoulder blade on each side…
I know because I do it
I love that your comforter is covered in pink polka dots and not grease spots
Thank you for the comment
! I’m sorry you don’t get more comments—I think your blog is fabulous! I have slept the exact same way for 17 years—-left side, one leg up in the “4″ position, right arm on top of the pillow, left arm under it. That’s how I fall asleep, that’s how I wake up! And now the left side of my face is more wrinkled than the right and my left shoulder always hurts! Maybe I should experiment with the pretzel?! SO glad to know you’re not naked and hairless 
Best to you,
~Jennifer P.
I am SO glad I’m not the only one who sleeps weird!!!
Katie-the pink bubbles were my weak attempt at re-creating my comforter.
I am a stomach sleeper – after having 4 children, I relish sleeping on the tummy!
You are one of my fav’s!!! And if we ever both went gay and ended up together, we would have to sleep in separate beds. I sleep the exact same way.
I am relegated to the side of the bed to which I hold onto the actual frame, while on my stomach with a 25 pound puggle pushing me off. I’m hoping for a sleep number bed and that the dog will prefer the BF’s number better
I’m the same way with the bed. If I’m alone, I hug the edge. But when hubby is there, I need to establish an anchor with the matress and the covers. I am a selfish sleeper.
I call that magnet sleeping. Your body is magnetically attracted to your husband so it is constantly seeking him out. It is his fault you can’t sleep!
Here’s your problem, you’re too nice. I have my hubby trained. He’s not allowed to mess with my sleeping positions. He messes with me, he gets woken up and bitched at. He messes with me again it gets repeated with some sort of physical pain involved. I haven’t actually had to up the level of pain with a third offense, he’s not that stupid. Consequently I sleep in peace. He used to snore too. I find that he doesn’t when he sleeps on his right side so he’s only allowed to sleep on his right side. See, you get them nice and well trained and you’re sleeping conditions will improve dramatically. Sharing is a relative term, learn to use it in that manner.
Thanks for visiting my blog, cute dogs too!
TOO FUNNY! I love your creativity with paint…and that stick figure looks pretty pliable…for a stick figure lol. I do the pretzel…then live to regret it in the morning! Great post….you get an A+ for uniqueness and for the added ha ha’s
Two words: King-size bed.
Or is that three words?
Oh! And I LOVED your sleeping pictures!
That had me cracking up! Just out of curiosity, is your bedspread brown with pink polka dots?
Oh my goodness, this post is SO hilarious! I think my real question is why are your eyes open if you’re asleep?
I think that I sleep mostly on my side, but I don’t really know. I probably move a lot.
This post had me laughing out loud at my computer screen. Great pictures!!!
Your pink polka detail have not gone unnoticed in your fastidious drawing.
Hilarious!
Very nice stick person! That was probably one of the biggest adjustments when I got married–getting used to sleeping in the same bed with someone. I was pretty sleep deprived in the beginning.
This was the most hilarious post I ever read. Seriously!
[...] 5, 2009 by gingela5 I know I’ve discussed me sleeping before (see here). That was more about positions now I’ve discovered something NEW to add to my beauty while [...]