Wow, I’m Bad At This…

I don’t know what my deal is lately.  My brain just hasn’t had the willpower to write.  I’ll get through this trying time.  Thank you for understanding.  Moving on from my last post (you’re welcome for getting THAT mental image out of our heads!) …

Please tell me I’m not alone in the following thought:  I had crushes on the Disney princes when I was a little girl. 

Am I alone in this? 

I mean what is there not to love about them.  They’re charming, PRINCES, and they’re good looking.  (At least as far as cartoon men go)

Let’s take a look shall we?

Oh Prince Charming…I think you were my favorite.  Look at that dark hair and those beautiful eyes. He also was quite a stunning dresser.  And he didn’t settle for just ANY woman.  He searched and searched until he found his true soul mate.  Swoon…

This is Beast after the transformation.  I’m sure he has a name but is it really important?  I mean look at the man cleavage coming out of that shirt.  I appreciate him because he was a harry guy, I feel his pain.  People look at you when you’re different.  He probably could have used some therapy for his anger issues though.  Thank goodness Belle saw through it and didn’t fall for Gaston. 

 

 

I don’t know much about Prince Ali. I only watched Aladdin once.  Although he’s not ugly, he’s almost too young looking for my taste…NEXT!

Snow White’s Prince.  He’s ok.  He seems debonaire and he swept her off her feet.  However, is it just me or does he sort of resemble Chuck Woolery? Or is it David Hasselhoff?  I can’t tell.  That’s kind of a turn-off.  Sorry Prince…

 

Sleeping Beauty’s Prince Phillip.  He woke her up from a deep sleep.  A VERY deep sleep.  With a kiss!  He must be an AMAZING kisser.  Now that I think about it, he’s moving further up my list as I type. 

Finally, there’s Prince Eric.  Look at him.  Dark hair, blue eyes, bright white teeth, and look at that jaw-line!  Wowzers.  Little Mermaid was definitely my favorite movie as a young girl.  And I think it all had to do with him.  Although he does have one fault.  He fell for the first girl with an actual voice that came his way after he met Ariel. And I know he was put under a spell but whatever, love conquers all right?  Oh that Ursula was so evil…sorry I’m getting  off track here. 

Am I the only one who had a crush on a cartoon male (or female I guess)? 

But I love these two the most…even more than Prince Charming. 

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I’ve Mastered the Astaire…

Unfortunately I have no pictures to go along with this story…

You know the saying “Inconvenient things happen at inconvenient times”?  No, you don’t?  Well I may have just made it up. 

Why I am sharing this with you I don’t know.  It’s way too much information for you to know about someone you hardly even know. 

When we were in Kansas City visiting my in-laws I got sick.  Not like fun sick where you can lay around and watch tv and just veg, it was the kind of sick that had me running to the bathroom quite often. 

I guess I deserve it.  Not a month earlier I had been making fun of an anonymous friend (I’m sure she would want her identity revealed) for the exact same ailment.  God always has his way of saying IN YOUR FACE when I mock others. 

And as you would expect it was the busiest day of the trip–a football game and a trip to Dave and Busters.  Long car rides and no breaks at home.

I have mastered the dreaded public depositing.  Flush, push, flush, push…shuffle your feet…pull out toilet paper…conveniently cough… It’s a tricky game, but as a woman you can never, EVER be heard. 

Luckily, after five Immodium, probably ten Tums, and a good nights sleep I was back and ready to eat and eat and eat.

Maybe here’s a couple of more pleasant images than the mental image I’ve given you.

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Ok, Where Was I…

I ain’t apologizing for nothin’.

I got lazy–end of story!

Now back to the tale at hand…

We went golfing about two weekends ago when we were visiting my in-laws in Kansas City.  Of course, you know me and I use the term “we” EXTREMELY loosely.  I didn’t even drive the cart.  I spent most of the time holding on to the side of the cart trying not to fall out and of course complaining (the thing I do best!)  The big bet was how long it would take for us to get kicked off the course.  I said after the first hole. 

It was really cold. And windy.  Perfect conditions for golf.

And this was my cousin in-law pulling his pants BACK up on the first hole.  He got paid back for being a punk–hello raw nipples! 

I look ridiculous in this picture. Just plain ridiculous.  It’s all a lie too.  I was too wussy to drive the cart.  And I love being a walking contradiction–obviously flip-flops go with sweatshirts.  It all makes perfect sense. 

Here’s my husband who’s pretending to nonchalantly look off into the distance.  He’s under the impression that he could be some sort of model. 

I did see a little bird that I thought was so adorable and all I got was “oh my gosh it’s a little bird that we see everyDAY at home.” I don’t care what he says. It was cute.

It was a nice little jaunt but the weekend did have one sour note (well TWO sour notes but I’ll get to that at a later time).  Since this is MYDogumentary I feel it’s necessary to report on all happenings of all dogs in my family and my extended family.  My husband’s aunt and uncle’s dog Oreo had to be put to sleep while we were there due to a tree branch snapping and falling on him and crushing his pelvis and other significant injuries.  He was the sweetest dog who had a rough life before he was adopted by the in-laws family.  He lived a great life with them  and he will be missed! I don’t have a picture of him so we’ll just leave out dog pictures for the day.  And I’ll leave you with this…

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