Archive for March, 2009

I’ll be back with regularly scheduled program sometime soon.  In the meantime here is my entry for I Heart Faces Pets!


Sadie got the entry last time so it’s Lexi’s turn!   She’s just so melancholy I love it!  And the wood floor is nice and clean as always…


Go check out iHeartFaces…it’s the best!

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Awwww, vacation.  I was given a few days off for Spring Break this past week.  I have taken FULL advantage of them.  I got sick on Saturday and yesterday was the first day I felt like a total, complete human being. 

It’s nothing new getting sick the moment I have a free day (or few days).  It’s just my luck and I’m sure I’m not the only one who has this luck.  Although I should be completely caught up on sleep and I think I’ve watched enough HGTV to now be considered an interior designer.

My shining moment of the week came last night.  Or I should say really, REALLY early this morning.  I woke up soaking wet. In a puddle of water. In bed.  It took me about five seconds to figure out what I had done.  I’ve been coughing so badly that I have to keep a bottle of water next to me so I can soothe my throat.  Well apparently I fell asleep with the bottle in my hand and managed to dump it all over me and my side of the bed.  I quickly grabbed my pillow and jetted before I woke the hubby up.  About ten minutes after I had gotten up he shoots out of the room looking for me—“That isn’t pee is it? Please tell me I didn’t just put my hand in pee.”  I had to reassure him that if I would have peed myself I would have woken him up and, in total shame and humiliation, let him know it’s time to change the sheets.  But now that I think about it, it’s pretty embarrassing to say you spilled water all over yourself too…

Who misses those sweet pups?



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I know you all are thinking–how could she possibly hate her husband? Well, it’s easy.

Let me do a quick run down of his working out/losing weight and mine:


Mon-ehhh I don’t think I’m going to run

Tues-Run for 30 minutes

Wed-Doesn’t Swiffering count as exercise?

Thurs-I decided to walk because I’m sort of tired.

Fri-It’s Friday-I just want to relax


Result: “I lost 5 pounds-I wasn’t really looking to LOSE any weight.”


Mon-Run/Walk for 35 minutes, abs, arms, more abs

Tues-Run/Walk for 35 minutes, lunges/squats

Wed- (crying as I climb on the treadmill) Same as Mon

Thurs-(Regretting I booked a trip to Destin) Same as Thurs

Fri-(Thinking people in Destin are non-judgmental) Same as Mon/Wed

Weekend-Either walk or run one of the days

Result: “How the heck did I GAIN a pound?”

And please, PLEASE don’t even get me started on the diet portion of my misery…

I already told him that if he shows up on the beach with a six-pack after I have been doing all the work that he’s a DEAD MAN!!

This picture is for Nikki!  No hineys to be seen in this pic!!


 That’s grass flying in the air, not a dirty lens! 

And finally, Thank YOU Michelle for your advice on the dog biting.  I’m going to try to recognize warning signs so I can correct before it gets violent!

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I’ll tell you what’s awesome. Well first it would be awesome if I used the correct punctuation in my title–hello question mark!

But the second most awesome thing is when your sweet, cute, fat dog named Lexi decides to bite a house guest.


(Doesn’t she look like a monster?)

Poor John (house guest) chose the wrong time to walk in front of her.  Just like a crocodile she struck.  Luckily she didn’t draw blood.  She spent most of the rest of the weekend sucking up to John, me and the hubby to try to win us over.  

I’m not really sure how to react to her biting someone.  It’s like finding out your kid bit another kid in the nursery. (Ok, that’s a true story–when I was a baby I got bit in the back by another baby in the nursery!  I think he was just flirting with me–I was such a cute baby!)  You can’t hold a grudge, but you can’t just ignore the fact that she bit someone.  DOG WHISPERER I NEED YOU!

Now this pup…


She was a perfect angel.  Other than the fact that her seat kept getting taken she enjoyed tolerated company. 

Maybe someday something will actually happen with a human being so I don’t have to write about my dogs EVERY TIME! 

 I actually have a really funny toilet story but it’s even too gross for me to write about.  We’ll just leave it at-the toilet wouldn’t flush in a public restroom so I had to take matters into my own hands…

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This is the look I get when I yell at Lexi to stop eating poop in the backyard.  And by eating poop in the backyard I mean poop that is literally falling out of her sister’s (Sadie’s) rear-end. 


I guess food tastes better the second time around.  Although I have to give her props–the other day she licked daddy’s face and I just hear, “OH YOU JUST ATE POOP DIDN’T YOU?!”

Now THIS is the look I get from Sadie when I am making a turkey trail to get her to come inside when I am ready for BED DANGIT!!  I should not have to lower myself to hiding behind a door, making a trail of lunch meat, and the minute she walks in through that door slam it behind her and scream, “IN YOUR FACE SUCKA!!” When I’m sure she’s thinking, “Hey, I’m the one eating turkey and treats right before bed–and you don’t eat after 9 is that right?  Yeah, you’re the SUCKA!”


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First and foremost I want to thank you all for your condolences and sweet thoughts!  Me, my husband, and his family really appreciate it! 

There’s nothing better to do to get things off your mind than go BRA SHOPPING!!  It’s a nice self-esteem booster–right up there with trying on jeans and bathing suits.  Anyone else hate trying on bras?  I DO NOT! Lauren and I headed out to Victoria’s Secret anyways to see if we could depress ourselves into oblivion.

Apparently my boobs and back have spawned into something out of this world because nothing, NOTHING fit. It didn’t help that it seems that the bra that I had been wearing for the last year (sick I know) had stretched and turned into some hybrid size–so I really had no idea what size i was.  I was afraid to get fitted because I didn’t want the Victoria’s Secret lady saying, “I’m sorry we actually don’t carry 48 AA.” After the first round of bras (which none of them fit) I believe the terms “stuffed sausage” and “more rolls than a bakery” were thrown around. 

Round two went a little better, I still had some sausage under the arm but I refused to go up a size.  So I did what any normal girl would do-grabbed the bra that fit the best and skedaddled.  In the end I went up a cup-size AND up a size around.  Now don’t you feel like you know me a little bit better now? Lucky you!

Could you imagine having to buy a bra for EIGHT boobs?



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